Best filthy jokes. The 9 Best Dirty Jokes of All Time 2019-01-11

Best filthy jokes Rating: 9,2/10 1952 reviews

17 Dirty Jokes That Are So Filthy You'll Need A Shower

best filthy jokes

Q: Did you hear about the guy who ran infront of the bus? What do you get when you do that? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from. A: Because they've got big mouths and little dicks. What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? Why do sperm have tails? Right when I came she screamed: whip me, bad boy, whip me. Q: What is pink, goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet? He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. A man had some problems with his marriage and was talking to a psychiatrist. Why did God give men penises? She's going to eat me! A: They don't know where home is Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Juicy the rack on that babe just now? A: Having sex with a pregnant woman and getting a bj by the baby.


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Sex Jokes

best filthy jokes

In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. If she responds to it, you can expect a conversation that would lead to what happens next. They both irritate the shit out of you. Three feet of my cock up your ass. A bus full of Nuns falls of a cliff and they all die. That was just an insect. A: Two, One to screw it in, and one to take a picture.

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Short Dirty Jokes

best filthy jokes

Q: What do you call a retard in a tree with a brief case? You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball! A: Slick her hair back she looks 15. These jokes contains naughty words and phrases. A: A submarine Q: Whats long, Hard and Erects stuff? A: Putting her back in the wheelchair when your done. A: Dress her up as an alter boy. You can unscrew a lightbulb. Filthy Jokes If you are easily offended, take a look at some of our other pages instead, because these might not be for you.


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The Official Comedy Central UK Site

best filthy jokes

The woman was used to many things so she just did what he had asked. Pepper come in a bottle? Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. Q: What does a rubix cube and a Penis have in common? A: They both have the ability to misfire. How do you embarrass an archaeologist? What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? What do you call a goat that practices safe sex? A: If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts! The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porn film and it was due out in a month. A: Because their plugged into a genius! If you stab them, they die.

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Short Dirty Jokes

best filthy jokes

I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. The mother is going up and down on the father and when she sees her daughter looking at them she immediately stops. Q: What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection? A: Cover me im going in! How do you embarrass an archaeologist? The rabbit said no so the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit. With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row of the adult cinema, next to a couple who also seemed to be in disguise. Oh come on, you can admit it. Q: What do you call an afghan virgin A: Mever bin laid on Q: Why is santa so jolly? You can unscrew a lightbulb.


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Dirty jokes

best filthy jokes

Well, last week was my birthday. You can throw this one with your friends when you are throwing knock knock jokes and it will surely put you in the lime light. My parents forgot and so did my kids. The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel. A: They already fell for that trick once. A: Because his pecker is on his head! Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: They both only change their pads after every third period! He only comes once a year. Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? Q: What do u call a bunny with a bent dick? How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex? How is life like a penis? My Mexican friend wrote a song about a tortilla.

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Best dirty jokes ever

best filthy jokes

Q: Why did the boy fall off the swing? The other watches your snatch. Liquor in the front, poker in the back. Do you know some naughty jokes which we do not yet have on this list? A: Because they can't stand up for themselves Q: Whats the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Q: What did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit? The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. What do you call the lesbian version of a cock block? A: A good thing screwed up by a period. Q: What's slimy cold long and smells like pork? But only 10 % enters the partner, which means that 360 liter floats away.

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Best dirty jokes ever

best filthy jokes

Why are his legs sticking in the air? How many is a brazilian? Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? Q: Why was the African American girl quiet during the movie? You can also use this joke as a way to send a message to your friend that you want to take things a little farther with her. There are twenty of them. There was this one time. What do you call a smiling Roman soldier with a piece of hair stuck between his front teeth? Sexual harassment is nothing but a pat that is lingering a bit too long! How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips? What do you call a cheap circumcision? The more you play with it, the harder it gets. A: There are only two handles on a garbage can.

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Best 25+ Filthy jokes ideas on Pinterest

best filthy jokes

One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex. Suddenly the girl's grandma came by and saw her. What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public? My penis is the same size as an infant and I hope you could deal with that once we are married. It runs in your genes. Q: How do you make an old woman start cursing? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

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