It will help your parents to have someone close and trusted to talk to about your coming out. The best thing you can do is wait until your mom is in a good mood and approach the topic gently. What about two people of the same gender who share an emotional bond? Not that this even compares, but when Ryan and I were about to move abroad, it was so hard to tell my parents about our decision. Trust me when I tell you that you cannot yell someone into heteronormativity if that is not their truth. Marital conflict was not uncommon, and many parents reported a kind of shame as they tried to relate to and share with people in their local faith community. But if there's a chance things will get quite well out of hand, an indirect approach might be best.
In addition, I would add that whether or not they verbalize it, all parents want answers to these questions: 1. In many cases, it might be best to do this in private. Because it is something out of our control. Be honest This is the most fundamental piece of advice, and also the most important. Those looks come from pity. You might be able to tell them that you need to know that you are more important than their friends, though.
It is up to you as an individual to decide when it is a good time and when there is a good reason. The biggest thing to look out for is that they'll probably be really afraid of other people hurting you emotionally or physically and push you to remain closeted for fear of something like this happening. Maybe again negative stories are louder. Ever since was printed here on the Huffington Post, I've been getting emails. Screaming and sermonizing are conversation stoppers and they prevent you from listening and learning, which are your most urgent tasks in these moments. Do they make any remarks, or do they have any particular behavioral reactions that would hint at their opinion? It may take time and effort. On the contrary, perhaps your family likes to talk things through, or perhaps you express yourself better verbally.
Being gay, after all, is a sin. Unfortunately, as so many pastors in the U. My mother yelled at me. If you are upset or angry, then it may not be the most appropriate time to share this information. Regardless of your theological perspective or your personal feelings on what your child is naming as their truth, punishing them either with violence or silence or distance will do irreparable damage and will become an emotional barrier that once erected, you will find nearly impossible to scale. The fact that your sister is okay with it is a good sign.
In this Article: Coming out to your parents seems intimidating and daunting for many gay men, lesbian women, asexual individuals, and bisexual or transgender individuals. They're just thinking things over and they will come back to their senses soon enough. This is also called ''. When you're nervous, it can be tempting to dance around the subject. Growing up in that environment I spent most of my life in denial. Parents here reported ambiguous loss, negative emotions e.
Aaahh sounds tough, I can really relate to your situation, but don't feel pressured like you have to come out to them now, or tomorrow; just something an online friend said to me and its really true. I'm skipping some family events that I used to go to on a regular basis. If you are young and living at home, your options will be limited and you may have to put up with a certain amount of such proselytizing from your family. Remember that this will take them time. Day after day, jokes and sarcasm involving my sexual preferences began to pile up. During this time, stay calm and try to be the better person.
The first issue deals with first becoming aware and responding to the disclosure of same-sex sexuality. Please let me know if you would like to continue this conversation when you calm down. This article was co-authored by. Before you come out to your parents, read this section and check out this archived page of. Drop small hints here and there, that way they have time to think about it and possibly accept it.
However, remember that you might make more progress if you are able to do so calmly. They will want to know that you are happy. Lay down your feelings for theirs. If I can speak from my own experience, this will make a really big and really good difference in your life. As far as the actual coming out. Sooner or later my two worlds will collide and I really don't know what will happen.