But your tune may change if you find yourself in the midst of this exact situation — no matter what side of the infidenility you're on. My mother tried to comfort me by explaining that Hillary had simply done what most women do: make a selfless sacrifice for her marriage and family. This gives rise to a blind possessiveness, even in the face of infidelity. Woman are far smarter then a man could ever be. They were at least as attractive as the mistresses and a great deal more intelligent. It was opened by a red-faced, flustered young woman. Is he hiding texts from you and trying to find ways to stay out late? Well no, cheaters are so selfish and greedy that they prefer to skate on thin ice and then blame everybody else when the you-know-what hits the fan.
The shame I felt about staying with a husband who cheated is reinforced by our culture. Once they started reeling off their conquests, it was impossible to shut them up. But they let their men walk all over them. Even if a woman does not entirely rely on her man for her essentials, leaving her husband often means cutting the household income in half. They just find themselves compelled to bust out of their day-to-day routine in search of something new.
They believe that with the lying over with, they can begin to repair their relationship. A deep-seated fear of intimacy can be hard for some guys to overcome. But even though she had caught him, Teresa decided to forgive him. You can explore the possibility of , which is what some people do after affairs, Nelson says. Women often experience it as a wake up call to a sense of autonomy, she explained. Her work can be found on Role Reboot, Alternet, and on her blog:. Fact 9: Affairs can often fix a marriage.
She is a published poet and author of Inside the Insane, Screaming at the Void, What Men Should Know About Women, What Women Should Know About Men, Diamonds From The Rough and Undressed. As more women are financially independent, they are less dependent on their partners. This all contributes significantly to a couple's being interested in one another and feeling a deep attraction for and excitement about one another. They feel lonely, ignored, not paid attention to, etc. This is especially true if the couple have children. Sometimes cheating is a symptom of a problem in a relationship and giving up the relationship is just not always the answer. Both smart women and smart men stay in relationships both straight and gay, where one has cheated on another for many reasons.
Intimacy expert Mary Jo Rapini explains, A lot of women think that all cheating women are floozies—not true. Regardless of whether a woman ultimately decides to stay with the cheater or leave him, doing the wrong thing in the initial stages of discovery can actually make a bad situation worse. It has been a long time since she and her partner have been in a relationship. Can you support yourself without their financial contribution? Infidelity could make the marriage stronger. And perhaps the sense that his behavior was shameful to me is why I did not want to see his subsequent affairs. Tall, blonde and witty, she lives in a stunning house outside London with her husband Nick. I am the wife of a previous cheater but I am not worried about being alone, I do not rely on him for income or support, my kids are grown and would never have held it against me if I left him, and we are not linked professionally.
You make this other woman sound awful. Flings can highlight how little self-control someone has, explains Orlando. At the end of the day, each woman has to do what is best for herself, her husband and her children and while we may not understand her decision, or may even strongly disagree with it, we must respect her decision to make it. Or to put it in more therapeutic language, an affair is nothing more than a symptom of a troubled marriage. That can mean sexual needs — but it often means someone's emotional needs aren't being addressed. If you harbor resentment for your partner, it is difficult to be hot for that person, especially if you are in a long-term relationship or marriage.
And they are secretly afraid to end up alone, old, and poor. Or there are other psychological implications at play between couples. But I know he loves me and I truly love him. Well, let me educate you a little. But the reasons the sexes cheat are different, says Orlando.
Some women will even be relieved to sambaza their husbands to others because they are simply tired of them. If they did, would they risk inflicting such pain on them? In my experience, this attitude does more to isolate women when they most need support than it does to genuinely empower anyone. While men are more likely to be motivated by physical urges, women are more often driven to cheat for emotional reasons, such as feeling neglected by their spouse. Being young and naïve and probably unable to understand the dynamics of married life, I was so sure that it would not be long before Hillary Clinton gave her husband the boot, a public and humiliating one at that. For example, people tend to talk about how infidelity happens when women want to seek out emotional support, or they fall in love with someone else. He obviously will do this again and along with you hurt others.
Being tied together professionally When two people enter a relationship, especially marriage, their lives become more and more intertwined. Financial reasons There are women who are unable to, or believe they cannot make it on their own without the financial support of a cheating partner. Because it feels wrong, it feels good, says , sex and relationship therapist and author of and. She will stay, iron his clothes and even go as far as to cooking his favourite meals with a smile and act like he is forgiven of all his transgressions. For the sake of love There are some women who think that love will heal their problems.
Fact 8: A couple will never work it out when the husband is in the midst of an affair. Ok, I have to say that the above categories are very unflattering to the women who stay and also so bad that those that do stay will try to hide it so they are not judged as weak, stupid or desperate. Whatever the reasons, cheaters give monogamous men the majority a bad name. You might not be surprised to hear that money may cause women to cheat, but the explanation for this is probably not going to go quite the way you thought. Cheaters don't generally pick up random women in bars. I would rather walk away from the relationship, start anew and let my living well be my revenge. Some women feel that they have landed in a rut and that their life has become predictable and boring.